I've been somewhat easily irritated lately, to have the same person constantly come back at you with pointless remarks that you can't get around, things I can clearly see that it's wrong, but never able to find the words to properly explain it to them, and yet they seem to feel oh so content with themselves that they've had the last word. Yes it's one thing to know that you yourself is aware that the other is wrong, but the matter still bothers me somewhat.
So what's the plan? I'm just going to abandon all those that don't take me seriously, those who see me as just another person they happen to know. If they're not going to bother hanging on, then I'm going to let go. Once again I am prioritizing education above family and friends, apathetic as it may be, I think it's the best way for me to seek comfort faster. OK, I've worded that wrongly and I can see the impressions that people can get out of, but I can't think straight enough to get a clearer wording.
How typical of me to start off yet again with complaints, it seems like I always feel like writing it all down whenever I get overridden by annoyance. Is that a good thing? To be honest, in this new approach of mine, I wouldn't care less, my blog, my purpose.
Stressful times, why I left everything until Yr13 I've no clue, everything's piling up so much I'm doubting whether I have enough time to clear it all up and know it all by the end of college. I've already devoted myself to an academic life, but somehow the way I am with things even now, aren't convincing that I'm fully committed to this.
I wished that one day everything will have worked out for me, that there'll come a time where I can go without fear, worry, but yet I burden sorrow so heavily, the very foundation of my passion to strive for the better, whether it be knowledge, education or romance. The memories of my life's past are woven so intricately, to do such wonders must be dealt with in intense carefulness.
This is my aim in life, to fix what I did wrong, and only then will I be at peace, once in for all.
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